Off-topic chat. May contain offensive language or images.
By azrael852
#244157
Woman on Airplane

On a long haul flight, a plane passes through a severe storm.

The turbulence is awful, and things go from bad to worse when one wing is struck by lightning.


One woman in particular loses it.
Screaming, she stands up in the front of the plane.

'I'm too young to die!' she wails.

Then she yells,
'Well, if I'm going to die, I want my last minutes on earth to be memorable!
No one has ever made me really feel like a woman!
Well, I've had it! Is there ANYONE on this plane who can make me feel like a WOMAN?'


For a moment there is silence.

Everyone has forgotten their own peril, and they all stare, riveted, at the desperate woman in the front of the plane.

Then, a man stands up in the rear of the plane.

'I can make you feel like a woman,' he says.

He's gorgeous!

Tall, built, with flowing black hair and jet black eyes, he starts to walk slowly up the aisle, unbuttoning his shirt one button at a time.


No one moves.


The woman is breathing heavily in anticipation as the strange man approaches.

He removes his shirt.

Muscles ripple across his chest as he reaches her, and extends the arm holding his shirt to the
trembling woman, and whispers:






























'Iron this.'

:lol: :lol: :lol:
User avatar
By RussT
#244176
Jesus called, he asked for you to stop nicking his jokes.
By azrael852
#244187
Jesus?

You must have a hell of a phone line if you can call him or is it via a burning bush type thing?

:D
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By Quincy
#244229
needs more snakes
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By Sidders
#244231
ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! I HAVE HAD IT WITH THESE MOTHERF*CKING SNAKES ON THIS MOTHERF*CKING PLANE!!!
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By kendra k
#244243
that movie is awesome. i saw it last thursday.
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By Sidders
#244245
It just looks so bad that it should be funny. I thought the trailer looked naff, but I think it's actually supposed to be like that. I like the way even Samuel L. Jackson is taking the piss out of it.
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By kendra k
#244248
the whole cast did. go see it!!!
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By Walter Sobchak
#244255
For a film that was destined for the 'trash can', only brought back to life because some net geeks changed it.........

Its CRAP!
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By kendra k
#244264
have you seen it? don't knock it till you see it.
By azrael852
#244277
Whats next though?

Image

or

Image

or

Image

or

Image

Where does it end ????? :)
By Duckstar
#244331
I found it quite funny :)

I also like the images posted by azrael852, made me laugh :D
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By Betti911
#244335
Mafro wrote:
Betti911 wrote:
azrael852 wrote:Woman on Airplane



Not funny just sexist and sad. Know where I'd tell a guy to stick his shirt if he said that to me!


Silly feminist.


Stupid male chauvinist
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By Mafro
#244336
Away and do some dishes, woman, and fetch my slippers while your at it
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By Betti911
#244337
Hmmmmm and you guys on this forum wonder why you don't get much sex.......
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By Mafro
#244339
After a slight drought, I'm getting plenty at the moment.
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By fish heads
#244341
Betti911 wrote:Hmmmmm and you guys on this forum wonder why you don't get much sex.......


Don't tar us all with Sidla's brush
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By Mafro
#244342
Aww leave the poor guy alone
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By Sidders
#244346
fish heads wrote:
Betti911 wrote:Hmmmmm and you guys on this forum wonder why you don't get much sex.......


Don't tar us all with Sidla's brush

Yeah, to be fair, I'm probably one of the least sexist males of the forum. Maybe I should just become a chauvinist bastard, women seem to like them more.
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By fish heads
#244356
I didn't mean anything cruel by it Sidders. I was just saying that nobody really comments on things like that except you.

Don't change your ways though, if women like chauvinist bastards then is that really the kind of woman you want to be with? (I do know what you mean though, some girls seem to like utter tw@ts)
By azrael852
#244382
Betti911 wrote:
azrael852 wrote:Woman on Airplane



Not funny just sexist and sad. Know where I'd tell a guy to stick his shirt if he said that to me!


Oooeeeeerrr missus .
Storm in teacup comes to mind ! Image

If you cannot take a bit of sexist joking can I ask why you are a member of the website of one of the most sexist celebrity blokes in Britain right now?

(and long may he continue to do so ! )

All i can say is you need to get ya feminist stool and enjoy life otherwise we have another Pauline Fowler in the making!

In regards to me sex life, you may have noticed, if you took your time to read it, my profile.

The "sick note after playing with mines" as a Occupation is no joke and, as a result of it, i do not have a sex life.

I wish i was like the other blokes on here having very little which is a hell of a lot better than having none! :lol:

I need no pity as life is short and time is precious to be wasted being a boring liberalist.

Go on being the feminist and burn your bra. Its you that'll suffer with the back problems and saggy bits in later life ! Image

handbags at ten paces anyone ?
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By Quincy
#244396
i get plenty thanks
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By Sidders
#244438
fish heads wrote:I didn't mean anything cruel by it Sidders. I was just saying that nobody really comments on things like that except you.

Don't change your ways though, if women like chauvinist bastards then is that really the kind of woman you want to be with? (I do know what you mean though, some girls seem to like utter tw@ts)

I won't change for anyone, but if any woman would want to be with me at the minute, I'd have to consider it. Of course, it ain't gonna happen because girls don't like men like me.

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