The chrismoyles.net TV & Radio Show Reviews
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By Chris
#242143
1. Usher - Yeah 7:00 NEWSBEAT 2. Coldplay - Speed of Sound 3. Boogie Pimps - Somebody To Love 4. 2Pac - Ghetto Gospel 5. Sunset Strippers - Falling Star 7:30 NEWSBEAT 6. Wheetus - Teenage Dirtbag 7. Gorillaz - Feel Good Inc 8. Mario - Here I Go Again 9. The Bravery - Honest Mistake 8:00 NEWSBEAT 10. Tomcraft - Loneliness 11. Green Day - Wake Me Up When September Ends 8:30 NEWSBEAT 12. Jem - Just A Ride 13. Justin Timberlake - Rock Your Body 14. Tone Loc - Wild Thing (Tedious Link) 15. U2 - City Of Blinding Lights 16. Röyksopp -Only This Moment 9:30 NEWSBEAT 17.The Game ft. 50 Cent - Hate It Or Love It 18. Scissor Sisters - Comfortably Numb 19. Glen Steffani - Heavin That Girl (Chris Moyles Parody)

More from Big Brother to start up the show - and the Macy Gray lookalike wants to be olive oiled right up until the end - whatever that means. Elsewhere, Chris watched the England game last night. Not your usual England game though, this time it's was a women's game during Euro 2005. It's being hosted by England this time around, although you probably know that already from the masses of publicity that we just can't get away from surrounding it…Anyway Carrie doesn't like Women's football according to Chris - she thinks it should just be a man's game. A pretty outdated and sexist attitude methinks. Chris of course concentrated solely on the skills of the women involved - most typical men would rate them in order of fitness (and not the athletic kind). Not Chris though. Oh wait - he did…

Exam Time

Today is crunch exam time for the team - if you haven't heard the show this week or bothered to read any of the other reviews this week, then you wont know what this is all about. Basically the team are doing their GCES as part of the ever-helpful One Life scheme - but with Moyles and Co you are guaranteed hilarious results.

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Chris though has a cunning plan that will benefit everyone - he'll not take the exam to prove to the kids how important taking exams are. Good job he isn't doing a GCSE in logic then. Of course, it doesn't matter weather Chris turns up or not, as in the end he (and the team) already have jobs, cars and lovely houses - so as Chris points out, it's pretty patronising when they are worrying about exams that count, when real students are crapping their pants, because if they fail then there lives will be all screwed up. Good luck to all you students by the way - my exams last year didn't go so well and now I'm doing this. Should be inspiration for you all.

Another brilliant scheme by Chris to get out of the exam is as simple as the come - go to Alton Towers instead. No real reason, just that its more fun than doing an exam - which is true and you'd be hard pushed to find someone who'll disagree. Dave had a more accurate justification for going to the Theme Park though, posing it as one of those "What if a car left London at 11:04" type questions. Of course Dave being Dave he'd never work it out properly, so the only real solution is to drive there himself and find out. Genius. Later on Dave went on to come up with an even more genius way of linking the Theme Park trip to an exam - Rachel is doing Citizenship, which must surely include elements of a working Democracy, thus the team should have a democratic vote to see which is the most popular event. Someone's going to be top of the class with all these practical ideas for learning.

Despite all their efforts though, the team can't get out of the inevitable - especially since Radio 1 have gone and got a proper teacher and everything. He's called Mr. Thurston, and looks like this -

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His school has a pretty good system where you have two lessons first, then registration, so as Chris pointed out, you could miss the first 2 lessons then still be officially there all day if you turn up for the roll call. Carrie tries to get one up on her exam by putting on the tightest outfit she's worn all week. It doesn't work out for her though as Mr. Thurston is very strict - he wont even let them do the exam in the car on the way to a theme park. However - what doesn't work for Carrie doesn't mean it wont work for other people…

Dom: Check out that ass sir!
[Everyone Laughs]


Other Stuff On Today's Show

(*) Chris is being pestered by people to sign his copy of the Radio Times - Dave will probably find himself in a similar situation when his copy of 'attitude' comes out.
(*) Chris had another late one - it was his brother's birthday though. He was drinking shandy while the sun was out though - because having 2 pints is only like having 1 real pint. Or Something.
(*) Dave's Sky + keeps deleting all his favourite programmes, but saving all of his wife's shows. Something shady going on in the Vitty Household?
(*) Longman's off to America - but he's not putting Chris's picture on his suitcase for reasons that cannot be revealed.
(*) Another brilliant vote feature - exam themed this time. Exam or Theme Park - you decided in another great Radio 1 Breakfast show moment…*ahem*.
(*) Dom's final thought - we should trust our own thoughts and feelings. Thanks Dom.

Tedious Link - More Tedious Links here from MC

Reef Place Your Hands - "Hans" is a popular name in Germany, the birthplace of Boris Becker - Boris Becker plays tennis - Tennis is a sport you'd associate with Wimbledon, which is also the home of the Wombles - Wombles have big noses, which was also a characteristic of the Romans - The Romans were responsible for building lots of straight roads in Great Britain - Great Britain is who Zola Budd used to run for, even though she was actually South African, which incidentally is also the nationality that Patsy Kensit's character was in Lethal Weapon 2 - Lethal Weapon 2 is a film that provided the now classic cinematic quote "diplomatic immunity!" - Immunity is what you should have if you've received a vaccine - The word "vaccine" comes from the Latin word "vacca", meaning cow (educational) - Cowhide is used to make leather sofas - "Sofa" is another word for a "couch", which is a word often grouped with potato - Potato is a good vegetable for making soup - The amount of letters in the word "soup" is exactly four - and Four Weddings And A Funeral featured the Wet Wet Wet mega hit "Love Is All Around", which was written by Reg Presley from The Troggs, who also had a hit with "Wild Thing", which was also the title of a 1989 hit by Tone Loc - Which links us to Tone Loc and Wild Thing

A Quality Carpark Catchprase
Steve (1) Lost To
Gary (2)
Steve got a good few heckles into Moyles - although Chris quickly turned it round. Plenty of Chris is fat and Steve is ugly jokes for all. Gary lays floors for a living. He's laying this morning and he's going to do some floors this afternoon. *Wayhay*

<a href="http://chris.polymathic.net/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=9594">>Thursday 9th June- What did you think of this show/review. Post your comments here<</a>

Show is up, and platinum: https://archive.org/dow[…]