The chrismoyles.net TV & Radio Show Reviews
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By Chris
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MC - Sorry about the problems with the new reviewers folks, hopefully things will be sorted when Chris Harris gets back to run the show in a couple of weeks. In the meantime, and sorry for the poor ordering of these reviews, but Dopey from the chrismoyles.net messageboard has kindly reviewed last Monday's show - review is below:

DOPEYS REVIEW

1. Kylie Minogue – can’t get you outta’ my head. 7.00 NEWSBEAT 2. Stereophonics – have a nice day 3. Chemical brothers – Galvanize 4. Xzibit feat. Keri Hilson - Hey Now 5. Joss Stone – You had me 7:30 NEWSBEAT 6. Black eye Peas – where is the love? 7. Athlete – Wires 8. Elvis Presley - One Night 9. Lemar – is there any justice (in the world)? 8:00 NEWSBEAT 10. EMINEM – Like toy soldiers 11. D.Kay & epsion -  Barcelona 12. Ashlee Simpson – La la 13. Feeder – tumble and fall 8:30 NEWSBEAT 14. Beyonce – crazy in love 15. Scissor sisters – filthy gorgeous 16. Oasis – go let it out - TEDIOUS LINK 17. Ashanti – Only you 18. Good Charlotte – I just wanna live 19. Daniel Bedingfield - Wrap My Words Around You 9:30 NEWSBEAT 20. The Killers – somebody told me 21. Outkast – roses 22. Blink 182 – I miss you

The show started today with chat about the weekends big brother recap. After the news Chris discussed the UK radio aid, and had a dig at Nemone and Jade Goodie (Ex. BB contestant). Leading to a quick recap of the detox, Chris asked the team if any of the team had fallen off the wagon, none of them had, not even Chris. At 7:15 the link started with Chris guessing when grange hill was on, Dave asks Chris if it clashes with countdown, Chris says he doesn’t know as: “I’m not close to death”...

With a big build up today’s star pupil is….. Lemar but Chris and Dave weren’t allowed to know where it was (Rachel knew though). Chris and the team have a moan about being on the detox. With Dave then asking for another set of instructions for his Chris Moyles show juicer. The link then unfolds to talking about herbal tea, and then come the slightly corny jokes:

- “Have you got any chips left?
Yes
You shouldn’t have done so many then”
(drum roll)


To name just one of the many seriously unfunny jokes. The team then discuss their football teams results. Chris almost let the BB interview slip (that’s for later) after the 7:30 news. The teaser was Jackie saying “Tell him to kiss my ass, I hope he listens to that”. Wogan was on then for some reason (who knows what he was on about). Chris had a suspicion that Mills had fallen off the wagon. The conversation then lead to detox style farts, not the most pleasant thing to listen on the breakfast show but still it was quite amusing with Dave telling us that he farted on a badminton court. The subject was then changed to the quick chart recap, Chris then re-announced the official 1000th number one (it was Elvis BTW).

Afterwards Dave announced that he thought that the record “Sucked” and personally I agreed with him. Lemar was then on the phone talking about star pupil. Starting off with the fact that they didn’t think their school days were the best of their lives as they are far better off now. There were clues as to where Lemar actually is, Chris and Dave then guess as many places as possible. Lemar then wanted to know if there was any bike sheds there, Chris and Dave then get their suspicions as to what he means.

Dave: “Bail out”
Chris: “I hope not”


Then proceeded a slagging off of JK and Joel. Warning him to stay away from JK and Joel as they are trouble, but Joel isn’t too bad as he’s the simpler one of the two. Chris then goes down memory lane and tells us about his schools, saying although he hated school, he knuckled down and studied hard. After the 8:00 news Chris told us all the good things that he’s done since starting the detox. Leading onto a debate about the detox.

 “I just want to loose weight so I can pull more pop star chicks”

“During the news at 8:30 I’m going for a big poo!”

... were among the highlights of the debate. Who says there’s no culture on Radio 1. A check in with JK and Joel at 8:15 live from Christchurch with Lemar, at which point the pupil met the star pupil for the first time today. Another teaser for the BB press conference came at 8:25. With it sounding Jackie was pouring a drink during the conference, but what was it? Answer revealed later.

- “I didn’t know I was that ugly. I hope my husband didn’t see me”

“My regular diet of Pizza, Curry, Chinese, and that’s just breakfast” was the best line just after the news when the team talked about detox weight loss. The weighing with Dr. Mark was next. With Chris sharing his tips.

Results:

NAME
Dominic 14:9 -> 14:5 = 0:4lbs
Carrie 9:9 -> 9:8 = 0:1lbs
Joss 11:2 -> 10:8 = 0:8lbs
Aled 11:6 ->11:2 = 0.4lbs
Rachel 11:5 -> 11:0 = 0:5lbs
Dave 12:11 -> 12:5 = 0:6lbs
Chris 17:8 -> 17:2 = 0:6lbs
Total loss = 2:6lbs

A very good effort by the whole team. Well done! Remember to visit BBC One Life if your taking part or want help.

Lets get ready to ramblllllllllllllllllllllllle!

As you may (or may not) know BB Aled went to the press conference on Friday to ask Jackie, the question.

BB Aled gave Jackie a bottle of wine.
- “how many of the housemates can you name?”
“John, the worst person in the world, Lisa, Brigitte” that’s right three!
“would you consider having surgery to keep your looks?”
“Absolutely! I think I’ll have it soon”
“what will you have?”
“everything! A facelift”
“What the hells going on with those lips?”
“the who?”
“the lips”
“my lips?”
“YES, in England less is more”
“Yes their my lips. What do you mean less is more? I was born with them”
“have you had work on them?”
“NO! My sister has been asking for years, why don’t you have them reduced? Everybody in Hollywood looks like they swallowed a goldfish. These are mine. I would not have my lips pumped up”

These last two had me in hysterics when listening. pure brilliance BB Aled. 9:20 saw the beginning of another check in on the Star Pupil. With Lemar being asked to draw a pig. The team then discuss the psychology of Lemar.

Carpark cachphrase:

Contestants: Mark from Bexleyheath (2) Vs. Heather from Scarborough (1)

Catchphrases: ‘Rubbing salt in the wound’, ‘Learning the ropes’, ‘Pie in the sky’.

<A HREF="http://chris.polymathic.net/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=8887">>- Comment on Dopey's review here!!!<</A>

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