[Chris]

Hiya,

How has your week been? Not that I really give a damn...... Mine has been long and tiring. Like on Sunday I had one of the hardest days work in my life... though I find it hard not to sweat when I am eating my dinner. Yeah, it was F***in busy I was getting stressed, you know how it is you get stressed and you wanna take it out on someone.... that little 4 year old practically brought it on himself, walking into me with his stupid Thomas train in his hand! Ha it wouldn't be in his hand for long as he soon found out when I inserted up his arse. My day did get good though as a group of delightful Yanks came sweating through the door. They made my life easy as you could Toss anything into a bowl or a plate and they would be happy and I mean toss literally....if you get me. Apple Crumble with custard indeed! I gave them something far better. It's odd you don't usually use the words pleasure and work in the same sentence but that day I did.

I walked in on Chris telling Will to find something or another out about the song by 3LW... is it? Will couldn't find this out and Chris wanted to get a Shed Of Dread in their studio so that they could lock Will init. Will pointed out to Chris that it wasn't a really shed and it was just sound affects and besides it wouldn't fit in the studio.... not real you say, yeah right! That's like saying Jordan's breasts wouldn't make great pillows...

Next Chris was Re-mixing songs with the Eastenders song music and he managed to get it to go with the 3WL music. A wagon driver rang in and told Chris that 3WL stands for 3 Little women, Chris pointed out that even this Wagon driver bloke had better music knowledge than Will...

Next was Chris trying to explain why the first hour of the show was so crap. He tried to explain that because Mark and Lard got a Sony award and he didn't he was just making the first hour crap to highlight how good Mark and Lards show is. Then at 4:00 the show would suddenly change and it would be really funny and great!

Next up was Chris's Anne Robinson impression and The Weekest link spelt like that for legal reasons. It's time to find out who are the Mark and Lard fans and who are The Dreem team fans.

Round 1
Chris asked Will and Dave a couple of random questions and after getting almost all of them wrong...
Dave voted out (drum role).....Will! Reason: There were only 2 of them and he wasn't going to vote himself out.
Will voted out.....dum dum dum Dave! Reason: He is a smarmy get.
Will was the weakest link because he is a Div

Round 2
After asking Will and Dave some more questions which again they mostly all got wrong.
Dave voted out.............Will! Reason: He is a Div
Will voted out ..............Dave! Reason: He was being even more smarmy.
Dave was the weakest link this time round even though he got more questions right than Will did.

Round 3!!!

Chris asked Will and Dave even more questions! One of which was ''If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?''...who me? No of course not! Hop on baby...um or not...
Dave voted out.....(hmmm let me guess)...Will! Reason: Getting on my nerves.
Will voted out..............OH Jesus Christ you already f***ing know and if not you don't deserve to be reading this! Reason: He is getting on my nerves and so is this whole feature.

Right next, Chris asked where Will had gone, apparently he went to the toilet and when he came back he had his hand over his mouth...well whatever turns you on. Will had to go 2 floors up as the toilet that was on their floor was out of order. Someone's phone started going off during mid link and Will couldn't find it anywhere, he was searching around for it but couldn't find it, it just kept on going off... Look down your pants! Oh no sorry you didn't put the vibrator on did you, oh well can't help then...

The Great Receptionist Challenge.

Steve a Taxi driver dominated Jackie for The Great Receptionist Challenge.
He had to guess how long Chris played the theme music from ''Taxi'' down the phone, was it...
A)Hardly any B)A little bit C) A bit more<cough hint cough!!!> or D)almost all of it .....?
Yes if you guessed C you would have been...wrong and F***in gullible, you retard!
Yes it was D and Steve guessed it right and plugged his company and also gave out the number for the company and his mobile phone number... poor bloke

Next up, Chris asked Will if the could play their Jason Downs parody but Will said no but they could play it tomorrow. Chris asked why they couldn't play it, after all they were in Wills holiday home in Maowi so the bosses upstairs couldn't come down and shout at them. Chris backed this claim up with some sound affects he had. Will tried to make sound affects for seagulls but um it sounded more like a wounded cow...

Next was the VERY sexy Lizzie singing raining men, I have to say it was better than Geri's version but then again a walrus could do better oh sorry no difference then. Chris pointed out that Lizzie always makes up the words to songs as she never ever knows them, which was backed up by her making up words for it.... oh well at least she's got her looks...

Last thing was...

Which D.J Is On At 6:00.

Chris asked Dave this and the options were...

A) Sarah H B B) Trevor Nelson C) Emma B D) Vickey Marsden

After using some life lines up Dave guessed Trevor Nelson which was.........WRONG!!!
Sarah H B is covering for Dave Pierce at 6!

Well that was about all I got this week. Oh and to the sick f***er who sent me the advert for the Luke Skywalker action suit with vibrating Light-Sabre, Keep it up! I want more stuff like this to amuse me on those long cold nights in.

Ben
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